Advent Kiddos
by Dragon Princess Orochiko
Summary: What happens when you put freshman boredom, FFVII includes AC, DOC, CC, LO and BC, Kingdom Hearts, and Soul Calibur with a touch of Naruto and a dash of Excel Saga Randomness? WARNING: EXTREMELY RANDOM, FUNNY, AND CLEAN FANFIC AHEAD!
1. Chapter 1 Many Meetings

Kilik stood on the green hill overlooking the fields of soft grass. The breeze blew gently through his loose, thick brown hair. A squirrel sat on his hand and enjoyed the view too.

"Nice day, eh, Kilik?" the squirrel asked. Kilik didn't reply but simply smiled and nodded once.

In the distance a tiny black figure was flying towards him. He thought of it only as a bird until it oblong wings came into view. Apparently it was a large black bat. It had a passenger on its back which was really odd. The passenger was a little brown monkey with red horns. The bat had a head of thick black hair that blew back in the wind as he flew.

The bat sneered as he flew up. "Hello, Kilik!"

Kilik then recognized the bat as his friend and archrival, Dracula. Dracula's passenger was another of his friends, Monkey Demon. When Dracula flew up, Monkey Demon jumped off of his back and ran eagerly towards Kilik.

POOF

Dracula's small form vanished into the puff of smoke and was replaced by a tall, pale man dressed in all black except for the red lining of his thick, long cape. His face was generally good looking but would make a lousy Don Juan Demarco. His black hair was slicked off to the back except for a few bangs that had been thrown off to the side. His eyes were red a rubies and clear as water. He walked up to Kilik and whipped something out if his cape.

WHACK

POOF

Kilik vanished into a puff of smoke at the touch of the rubber chicken that Dracula had pulled out. His body was replaced with that of someone much taller and a very different nationality. His hair was thick and golden blond that was parted to reveal sea blue eyes that held a furious rage. He wore a French style dueling outfit of red, purple and black and an ornate saber hung at his right hip.

"You…" the man known as Raphael Sorel retorted. Dracula simply grinned innocently as if he hadn't done anything.

WHACK

POOF

In cloud of smoke stood Maxi, Dracula's alternate ego and Kilik's good friend. He wasn't too pleased either. He reached up and ran the palms of his hands over his smooth black hair.

"Aw man, you messed up my hair!" he grumbled. Raphael cocked his head.

"Bah! Don't look at me! I didn't do it," he snapped. Through the remaining cloud of smoke came a girl much shorter than Raphael and Maxi. She had short brown hair with a pink Chinese dress. She had a Chinese sword strapped to her back and she shouldered a rubber chicken. She walked up to Raphael and glomped him suddenly.

"Gotcha!" she squealed. Raphael smiled for once and glomped her back.

"This is not fair!" Maxi whined. Raphael drew his blade and thrust the tip to carefully rest on Maxi's throat.

"Hush," he said. He sheathed his sword, Flambert, and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

POOF

When the smoke cleared, Raphael was gone but a golden bat with a head of rich blond hair hovered gracefully in the air in front of Maxi's face. He flapped his wings and rested himself on Maxi's head.

"OFF!" Maxi shouted. He lashed out with the rubber chicken to swipe Raphael off his head. It was already too late when he remembered what he had done.

POOF

POOF

When the smoke cleared, the sight wasn't a pretty one. Dracula was flat on his chest and Kilik was laying on top of him back to Dracula's back. He was rubbing his arm and wincing. Dracula was desperately trying to get up but was failing miserably.

"Oh…owww," Kilik groaned. Dracula shook his head.

"Get off! Get off! You're heavy!" Dracula screamed. Kilik rolled off to see Xianghua laughing uncontrollably. She bent over and fell to her knees unable to get a hold of herself.

As Kilik stood up, he vanished into a puff of smoke and turned into Raphael again. He turned to Xianghua. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Xianghua giggled. "Never been better."

After a minute or so, she took deep breaths to calm herself down. She still chuckled once she was up on her feet again. Monkey Demon was chuckling too.

"Well, that was rather amusing," Raphael chortled.

TWANG

FWACK

"ARRRRGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Raphael screamed and fell to his knees. His head hovered inches from his head where a long, steel arrow shaft protruded from his right temple. Blood poured rapidly from the wound and onto his jacket. The veins of the arrow were golden eagle feathers with the tips dyed blood red.

"Raphael! Are you okay?!" Monkey Demon squealed.

"Do I look okay?" Raphael snapped. A girl of about seventeen or eighteen strode up slightly swinging her hips. A five foot bow rested on one shoulder and was steadied by her hand. She wore a simple sky blue tank top and blue jeans. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Strapped to her back was a massive magnum gun that looked way too heavy for any normal person to carry around as casually as she did. Crossed the opposite direction of her back was a quiver full of her steel arrows.

"Atari! Right on target!" she cheered. Raphael's eyes widened in rage.

"What do you mean right on target?" he snarled.

"Uh, duh! What do you think I meant?" the girl snorted.

THUNK

"Mary Kate!" shouted the squirrel that just smacked itself into the girl's head. It was a silver squirrel with a black stripe down her back. She wore sunglasses on top of her head.

"Tiltasquirrel!" Mary Kate chirped and peeled the rodent off her head to hug it. Tiltasquirrel quickly licked Mary Kate's cheek affectionately and scampered down her body. She ran to a tree and climbed up quickly to a branch that hung directly over where Raphael was crouched. She plucked a large acorn from the branch she stood on and threw it hard at Raphael's head. Once again, the target of Raphael's head was not missed. He cried out once again as the acorn sunk into the top of his head.

"Don't you think we're causing him just a bit too much pain?" Xianghua asked. Dracula laughed.

"Ha! The freaky fencing Frenchy pretty boy is supposed to be immune to pain!" Dracula snickered. Xianghua rolled her eyes and approached Raphael. Something was wrong. He had stopped screaming and seemed to be vibrating. Xianghua's eyebrows drew together in confusion. _What's going on?_

"Raphael? What's the matter?" she asked. Raphael didn't move but the shaking in his body grew worse.

"Blood…" he choked out. He slowly lifted his eyes to meet Xianghua's. They had been turned from rich sea blue to garnet red with an evil fire of hunger. His skin seemed much paler than it already was and his eyebrows pressed down hard against his eyelids. Xianghua backed up slowly.

"Raphael, what is wrong with you?" she asked. Raphael sluggishly rose to his feet and still kept a bent over stance. He bared his teeth in a terrible sneer. Xianghua could see his fangs were growing much longer.

"Need…blood," he huffed. Suddenly, he lunged at Xianghua. Already terrified by the horrible change in Raphael's face, she was unable to move.

"NO!" Dracula cried out and shoved Xianghua out of the way. Raphael flew straight into Dracula, knocking his head off…literally. Dracula's head crashed to the floor and his expression changed to one of pain. His body knelt down and began to feel around for the head. "Over here, you cur!"

"It can't hear you, Dracula. Your ears are attached to your head!" Tiltasquirrel pointed out from her perch above.

"Yeah, this is how you get its attention!" Mary Kate snickered. She walked up to the body and kicked the shoulder really hard. The body jolted a second and then turned to the correct direction that his head was in. It felt around and finally found its head only after poking Dracula's eye.

Dracula stood up with his head back on his shoulders. All his friends except Raphael began to laugh hard. He thrust his hands to his hips and growled.

"What's so funny?" he questioned. Something didn't feel right. He looked down and noticed his cape collar stuck up in front of his face. He also saw his back and bottom. "Oh…heh heh."

He twisted his head around with a deafening crack. The others shuddered. Raphael had his arms crossed and he stared at the ground.

"Forgive me, Xianghua. I lost control of myself there. I have already lost a lot of blood and if I don't drink some soon, I'll totally lose control or even die," Raphael explained, looking up. Everyone could see that his eyes were still red with hunger but not evil.

"RRRAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!" roared a monster as it ran up from over the hill.

"EEKS! It's a chimera!" Tiltasquirrel shrieked and jumped onto Dracula's shoulder. Monkey Demon hid her face in Dracula's neck.

Mary Kate ran forward and drew an arrow from her quiver and knocked it to the bowstring. "Just my kind of filth to fight!"

She pulled the string to her ear and quickly aimed. She let the arrow fly and it hit straight in between the chimera's eyes. She grinned hellishly and knocked another arrow as the beast charged at her.

THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK! THUNK!

The beast now lay on the ground, near death. Mary Kate had no more arrows and one more arrow would be the fatal one.

"Gah! Need an arrow!" she cried. She ran in circles looking for one more arrow. She noticed Raphael looking off into the west, panting. From the side of his head was the last arrow she needed. She ran up, grabbed hold of it and yanked it out sending Raphael into another spasm of screaming. Blood now gushed from the wound on his head.

Mary Kate knocked the bloody arrow, took aim and fired. The beast finally died after the impact leaving Mary Kate to dance in circles. Suddenly, Dracula spotted the blood gushing from Raphael's head and the vampire flame in him rekindled and raged. His already red eyes blazed and glowed with the hunger. He made his way through the cheering companions and over to the bleeding Raphael. He grinned as he carefully took the whimpering man's head in his hands and pressed his open mouth against the wound and tasted his blood to see if it was worth it. He found it to be well worth it. He could taste the blood of different animals and even a few people that Raphael had eaten of. He sank his teeth into Raphael's head and began drinking his blood.

"ARGH! Dracula! You impudent dog! Have you no manners?!" Raphael snapped. He yanked the acorn out of his head. "And what's with this?"

He chucked it at Tiltasquirrel (who had perched herself up on the tree again) with great force.

POOF

"Eh?" the man said that appeared in Tiltasquirrel's place. His eyes were wide with shock and surprise as he fell out of the tree. He slammed to the ground hard. His hair was black and cut short with a leather circlet on his forehead. His eyes were a rich electric indigo. He wore black cotton pants that slightly flared out at his ankles. He wore a sleeveless black shirt with an upturned collar. Both ears were pierced and bore small, simple hoop earrings and an ornate silver and emerald earring ringed the pointed cartilage of his left ear. Silver plastic rimmed sunglasses rested on top of his head. A giant two-hand sword at least six feet long and a foot wide was strapped to his back. "Oof."

"Draike!" Xianghua shrieked in delight. She ran over and glomped him.

"Ouhf! Hey Xianghua!" he said in a smooth, deep voice. Raphael grunted and stood up, taking the feasting Dracula with him. He stomped off.

"Where are you going?" MK (Mary Kate) asked. Raphael turned and pointed to Dracula.

"To get this blasted vampire removed! What else would I be doing?" he growled and stormed away, dragging along the vampire stuck to the side of his head.


	2. Chapter 2 We're off to see the mall!

**FYI, if you think this story is really dumb…just wait it out a few chapters….yes it gets more random…but it gets so much funnier…especially when Sephiroth and Cloud come in…okay, here we go!**

The waiting room of the hospital wasn't crowded. Raphael checked in and sat in a chair near the back. He immediately drew attention to himself because of the vampire stuck to his head. He sat and read a magazine to suppress his fury.

A young nurse strolled into the room. She wore purple pants and a white button shirt decorated with patterns of cartoon roses. Her hair was rich red and tied back in a short French braid.

"Mr. Sorel?" the nurse asked. _Finally,_ Raphael thought. He struggled to get up with the added weight but was eventually able to follow the nurse.

They got to a small examination room and Raphael slumped over on the patient's table. "I'll bet you haven't had a case of vampires yet."

"Nope. You're the first," the nurse commented as she checked his pulse (not like he had much of one) and temperature (blazing hot…114 degrees F). The nurse raised an eyebrow and checked the thermometer again. She figured Raphael wasn't totally human since someone with a body temperature of over 105 degrees would be dead.

"Wonderful," Raphael grumbled. The nurse stepped over to a counter and began asking him all sorts of questions about medical history, hereditary diseases, etc. "What does this have to do with my having a vampire stuck to my head?"

"I…I don't know!" the nurse admitted, half laughing. "The things they make nurses do these days. It seems that you have a vampire stuck to your head and it is drinking your blood."

"Duh!"

"Don't get fresh!"

"Sorry, madam."

The nurse put her clipboard down and opened a drawer in the countertop. She pulled out a little bottle of clear yellow fluid and a silver cross. She poured some of the liquid on the cross and returned to Raphael. She thrust the cross up in Dracula's face.

"Behold, vampire! Gaze upon your demise!" she raved. At first Dracula didn't respond. Slowly, his dazed eyes drifted toward the cross. He blinked once.

"YARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" he screamed and detached himself from Raphael's head. He ran around the room several times looking for a way out. He saw the closed window and ran straight through it, shattering the glass. The door had been wide open.

Five seconds later, the nurse's eyebrows drew together. "Shouldn't there have been a splat?"

Raphael ran to the window and saw the distant figure of Dracula as the vampire took off into the east. Raphael only threw his head back and laughed.

"Well that was easy," Raphael chuckled, brushing his hands off. "I'd like to show you special gratitude. Name the price."

"Well, it wasn't that much. Why the special gratitude? Removing vampires is rather a simple procedure," the nurse said, leading Raphael back over to the table.

"True but you have no clue how much that helped. Long story," Raphael said as the nurse began wiping blood from his head and face.

"Well I'd say in that case, eight hundred dollars ought to do the trick," the nurse said, putting two Band-Aids on the arrow wound. Raphael cringed. _Drat, I thought fifty dollars should have done it,_ he thought, _well it's not like I could have actually paid since I only have ten on me and I don't have blue cross blue shield_. He looked down and noticed the solid ruby and eighteen karat gold buttons to his jacket. He plucked one off and held it out.

"Is this enough? It's solid ruby and 18 karat gold. It's well worth over a thousand dollars but you can keep the change," he explained. The nurse snatched it up.

"Alrighty, that sounds fabulous!" the nurse babbled, starting to shoo her patient from the room. "Thanks for business, come again, sir!"

With that, she slammed the door once Raphael was out. Raphael rolled his eyes. "Women and jewels…"

He strode from the hospital a bit dizzy but already feeling much better. His other friends greeted him.

"How are ya?" Draike asked, fiddling with his collar. Raphael shrugged.

"He's a toughy. One arrow wound ain't gonna kill him," Xianghua said. Raphael walked past them.

"Where are you going?" MK asked.

"We gotta find that blasted vampire!" Raphael snorted.

"Oh…" Xianghua mumbled. "You mean Dracula?"

"Who else?" Raphael replied.

"Well, before we came here, I saw Dracula running like he'd seen the devil. I tried following him for awhile but then lost sight. I talked with a farmer briefly out west a bit and he said Dracula was heading towards the mall," MK said. Draike rested and hand on his hip.

"Then let us fly to the great West! Let us go where the air is free and the skies are blue and we can do what we want to do! Let us travel to this grand land known as the mall! It may be hard on the journey but if we stick together and don't lose faith, we'll make it there and rescue our beloved friend, Dracula, and we can live in harmony together at Mall!" Draike ranted. Crickets.

Xianghua slapped him. "Dude, something wrong. The Mall is a giant building full of shops and stores. It happens to be east."

"Yah, and its only three miles away," MK continued. Draike blushed.

"Let's go, slackers," Raphael grunted.

As they walked in the mall, Raphael suddenly freaked out that his button was gone. "Gah! My button!"

"What happened to it?" Monkey Demon asked.

"I used it to pay for my medical bill. MK, can you sew?" Raphael asked. MK nodded and took out a needle and gold thread. Raphael unbuttoned the other two buttons and shed his jacket. To everyone's dismay, that was the only thing he was wearing up top. His chest, back and arms were bare and shoppers near by giggled, pointed, cat-cawed, or turned away in disgust. MD (Monkey Demon) raised an eyebrow.

"Well at least he's not hairy," she groaned. Draike stormed up and searched around the nearest rack in JC Penny's for a shirt. He spotted one that might fit Raphael and yanked it from the hangar. He then pulled it over the vampire's head.

"This is a Strawberry Shortcake shirt! It's for a girl!" Raphael grunted.

"I know," Draike replied. Raphael's eyes widened in anger and his rapped Draike on the shoulder with a fist.

"Are we going to find this dratted vampire or not?" MK complained. Xianghua threw an arm around her shoulder.

"Yup, yup!" she squeaked. The five friends continued on slowly through the mall, chatting and fussing at each other. Raphael seemed to grow crankier by the moment. Then, Draike ran ahead to a shop.

"Hey guys! Check this out!" he said, pointing to the sign. The other four ran up. The sign said Build a Bot.

"Build a Bot? Kind of like build a bear?" MK asked.

"Yeah," Xianghua began. "I heard about this place. You make a robot that looks feels, and acts just the way you want it to. It even can have a personality."

"Really? I would like to build a robot for myself since it will be nice to have an intelligent being around, living or not," Raphael said and began walking into the store. Draike grabbed his arm.

"Aren't we straying from our mission to rescue Dracula?" he asked.

"What's there to rescue. We're just finding him. Let's make a quick detour, shall we?" Raphael said, strolling further into the store. The workers at the store seemed bored and yet delighted once the crew walked in.


	3. Chapter 3 One Winged Jerk

"Welcome to this fabulous store, can we help you with anything?" one man asked.

"Yes, I'd like to build a robot but I'm afraid that I am rather new to the process. Would you mind helping me out?" Raphael asked politely.

"Come this way," the man said. He led Raphael over to a large computer. The vampire cast a glance at his friends and found that they too were being led to different computers to begin making their own robots.

"First, choose a race. The races are listed or you can type one in," the man said. There was a total listing of over three million races or species. Raphael typed in human. "Alright, next choose male or female."

Raphael typed in male. From then on, the man explained how to change facial features and body features like muscles, skin color, etc. It took about an hour for the process to be completed. When he was done, Raphael had to wait another ten minutes while the actual robot was being made. Meantime, he paid for the robot with more jewels and went to see his friends were doing. They all already had their robots completed. Xianghua had a white ferret that was soft as a chinchilla and white as the purest snow. It cuddled affectionately against her neck. Draike held a sleeping squirrel of silver and black fur. The squirrel was twice the size of a normal squirrel and much cuter. MK didn't have one and neither did MD. They didn't find the need or want for one.

"So, is yours done yet?" Draike asked, turning to Raphael and stroking his new squirrel robot. Raphael shook his head.

"Actually, sir," the clerk said. "Your robot is ready."

The man that had helped Raphael make the robot walked up slowly, steadying another man. The other man was clearly the robot. His hair was light blond and spiked back. His eyes were cerulean and his fair skin was lighter than Raphael's. He was of a good build with the kind of muscles that basketball players get. He was dressed in all black with a shirt very similar to the one Draike wore and black jeans. On his left shoulder was a leather pauldron with a silver wolf head biting a ring as a clasp. A belt ran across his chest to hold on his pauldron and the massive sword that lay on his back. He smelled strange like roses almost but with a strange tangy aroma too. _Must be from the finishing chamber_, Raphael thought.

"Well, this is Cloud Strife, I presume," Raphael said, strolling around the android to observe details. "Very well made."

"There is one little flaw that I'm sure won't get in the way often," the clerk said. "He takes everything literally so if you say something like 'let's hit the road', he'll probably go out and start hitting the road with a stick or something."

Cloud began to walk away at the sound of 'hitting the road' but Raphael grasped his arm. To Raphael's great surprise, Cloud felt like human and his arm felt like it was flesh and not metal.

"Do you talk?" Raphael finally asked.

"Yes, of course I talk," Cloud responded, cracking a slight smile. Xianghua suddenly ran up and glomped him.

"He's so cute for a robot!" she laughed. Cloud raised an eyebrow.

"Never thought of it that way," he mumbled and slowly put an arm around Xianghua.

"These things actually have personalities. Weird," MK said, grabbing Cloud's hand and examining it. She looked up and faced the clerk. "Say, do you have any pre-made robots or rejects I can buy for a lot less?"

The clerk scratched his head. "Well, there is this one robot we made as an experiment but he was deactivated a long time ago for a terrible flaw."

Draike and Xianghua glanced at each other. "Terrible Flaw?"

"Um, yeah. I can show him to you if you'll just follow me," the clerk said and walked to the back of the store. The five friends and Cloud followed him into a tiny, unlit room. Inside was a human designed robot laying against a wall, deactivated. His skin was fair and he had silver hair nearly down to his knees. He wore a long, tight, black trench coat and black pants. White metal pauldrons were tightly fastened to his broad shoulders. A katana was propped up against the wall next to him and was about four times the length of a normal katana.

"He's not bad looking either," MK said, shrugging.

"That is Sephiroth. His fluke was the want to destroy everything that resisted him. We're not sure what caused the fluke but we've been too afraid to activate him and find out. We believe it's because he thinks his mother is some powerful being named Jenova."

Cloud suddenly cringed and quivered. "Jenova…"

"Never heard of it," MK said. She walked up to Sephiroth and bent down. She poked his face several times with her finger.

"Eh? What are you doing? I wouldn't do that! The button to turn him on is one his face!" the clerk said. But it was already too late. She had hit the invisible button right between his closed eyes and he glowed briefly with a reddish light. Slowly, his milky green eyes fluttered open and he glared directly at MK, his eyes slowly narrowing and his lips pulling back into a sneer. He gracefully got to his feet unlike you would expect a robot to. He reached out suddenly and grabbed MK's throat. Her hands flew to his.

"Hey, moron, let me go!" MK growled. Sephiroth lifted her off the ground.

"Only if you'll be my bride," Sephiroth proposed.

"Ok, that's messed up. She's human and you're a bag of bolts, Sephie," Xianghua observed. Sephiroth turned towards her and his face grew terrible with anger and irritation. He thrust his free hand out and Xianghua tried to scream but no sound came out. She couldn't speak. Raphael stepped forward and put a hand on Flambert's hilt but Cloud stopped him. Raphael turned gritting his teeth in annoyance.

"He's way out of your league right now. Leave this to Draike and I," Cloud suggested. Raphael winced and clenched his fists at admitting that Cloud was right. He stepped aside to let his robot by. Cloud reached behind and grasped the hilt of his colossal zweihander. Draike did the same to his sword. They stopped drawing their swords when they saw Sephiroth's hand clench tighter around MK's neck.

"Urg…let me go. Please…Sephiroth," MK pleaded, now turning pale. Cloud stepped forward and Sephiroth only increased his grip.

"Let her go, Sephiroth. Your bone to pick is with me," Cloud ordered. Sephiroth eased his grip just enough to stop MK from suffocating.

"My bone picking with you is over. I'm not interested in ruling the world. Mother instructed me to do otherwise," Sephiroth explained. He lowered MK to the ground and grasped both her wrists in one hand faster than lightning. As his hand slid off her throat, MK panted deeply for breath.

"To answer the mute one's earlier question," Sephiroth began, "There are ways of making humans into androids."

MK now thrashed against Sephiroth's grasp and screamed. Sephiroth merely laughed. "Struggle all you like, woman, you can't escape."

"Oh really?" Draike asked from behind Sephiroth. The startled robot was unable to move away as Draike grabbed both wrists and let his power release into Sephiroth's thick arms. The electricity stunned Sephiroth's circuits, causing him to let go of MK. Draike immediately threw his arms protectively around MK and flew back behind his other friends. Sephiroth took a few moments to recover from the attack. He glared hellishly at Draike.

"You will pay for that little stunt, human," he growled. Draike raspberried him.

"Uh hello, Sephie, see these pointed ears, sharp fangs, and whiskers on my back?" Draike said pointing to each feature. "I'm no human."

"Fine, freak," Sephiroth grumbled. The clerk stepped closer.

"Android command, deactivate immediately," he ordered. Sephiroth chuckled.

"Make me, wuss," he laughed. The clerk clenched his fists.

"Four two three one zero zero zero seven seven eight nine six, shut down immediately," the clerk barked. As if stabbed with poison, Sephiroth fell to his knees and fell forward, deactivated. MD bounded up to him and pounded on his head with her tiny fist. There was no response. His eyes were shut and eyebrows relaxed. The clerk turned to the gang. "That would be his glitches."

"Glitches? I thought you said there was only one glitch?" Raphael pointed out, cocking his head. The clerk chuckled.

"Apparently the blood loss has gotten to you. If you didn't notice, there were several glitches," the clerk said. "The major glitch was his want to take revenge on the world for no reason. The second was the fact that he still believes that he was made of a being named Jenova. We have never made an android by that name and neither has any of our customers so where he got that we don't quite understand."

"Final Fantasy seven and advent children," MK replied without delay. Everyone looked at her. She grinned. "I play too many games. He and Cloud must have gotten those crazy histories from the storyline of that game."

"True. I know I was created by Master Sorel-," Cloud began.

"Raphael," Raphael interrupted to correct.

"But one part of my programming says that I was born of a real human. I have no clue," Cloud said. "Anyways, Sephiroth's other glitch was the inability to distinguish life from imitative life. As you noticed, he wanted the lady over there to be his bride. I don't think he quite knew he was a robot."

"My name is Mary Kate," MK said (the 'lady over there'). "Makes sense. Is there someway you could change his programming to be a good robot?"

The clerk scratched his head thoughtfully. "Well, yes. I had never thought of it. It'll take about two hours though. Once I'm done, you can have him, on the house. Since he's pretty experienced with people until his glitches, you should be able to use him as a servant or bodyguard or something…I don't know."

"Sound's great. I'll be back in two and a half hours to pick him up," MK chirped, giving him thumbs up.

"By the way," Xianghua began. "How much memory are these robots installed with?"

"The normal is twenty-five terabytes but with Cloud's needed information, we boosted him up to five hundred teras."

"F-five hundred…t-terabytes?" Raphael gasped. "That could hold nearly all the movies of America alone! Do you mean Cloud's a walking ipod, flash-drive, DVD player and complete computer?"

Cloud chuckled. "You might say that but you'll find it annoying to actually try and use me as an mp3 player."

"Aw, no web surfing," Xianghua pouted. Cloud smiled.

"Not quite but ask me anything you want and I bet I can come up with the answer by finding it on the web," he said.

"Where the heck is that blasted vampire, Dracula?" Raphael grunted. Cloud closed his eyes momentarily. He seemed to be mumbling something under his breath.

"In the food court of this very mall," Cloud replied, opening his eyes. Draike's jaw dropped.

"How did you do that?" he gasped. MK ran up to Cloud and glomped him.

"I love our walking pager!" she squealed like a mouse.

"I have a GPS too," Cloud boasted. Raphael mumbled something under his breath and began to exit the store.

"Where ya goin?" Xianghua's white ferret squealed.

"To get back on track of our mission! Where else?" Raphael growled. Cloud ran up.

"Calm down, sir. You've only got three liters of blood left so try not to raise your pressure anymore," he suggested. Raphael raised an eyebrow and glanced at Draike. Draike shrugged. "Nothing to worry about. Just my programming."

As the gang approached the food court, they noticed that many shoppers were running from it. Some seemed terrified while others were confused. Many children were screaming. Cloud saw a young girl of about seven running past alone, she was calling for her mother. He caught her by the arm. She looked up at him with large, tear-blurred brown eyes.

"What is everyone running from?" he asked. At first, the girl was reluctant to answer.

"Big scary man! He's eating a pig on the roof in the food place!" she replied. Xianghua seemed revolted.

"Yup…that's Dracula for ya," MD grumbled.

"I want my mommy!" the girl cried and rubbed her eyes. Cloud slowly blinked but actually was photographing the girl, searching billion's of photos, finding who was her legal guardians, and GPS'ing her mother. He smiled. He looked over at the entrance to a store called Abra-KidAbra where a middle-aged woman was calling out for a 'Hanna'. The girl saw her mother and began running towards her.

"Thanks mister!" she called back. Raphael was thoroughly impressed by the piece of technology he had just bought. He continued on with the others towards the food court.

When they got there, the place was totally empty. There weren't even any employees in the restaurants. Everyone glanced around, searching for Dracula. They all stopped when Xianghua held out a finger for them to be quiet. Sure enough, they could hear a slow, _plip, plip_, of liquid splashing onto the tile floor. They saw a rather large pool of blood near the middle of the court. Blood seemed to be dripping from the ceiling.

"Well, well, well, what have we here?" Draike asked sarcastically, crossing his arms. They seven looked up and saw Dracula hanging upside down from the rafters by the crook of his knees. He clutched his chest as if he were trying to slow his heart rate. His eyes bulged in sheer terror and tears streamed into his hair. From his mouth hung a pruny looking pig the size of a St. Bernard. Most of its blood was in Dracula's stomach and some splashed onto the floor. Dracula seemed to be whimpering something fierce.

"Cloud, can you climb up there?" Xianghua's ferret asked.

"I could, but I think Raphael would rather have the honor of getting him down," Cloud snickered. Raphael grinned and pulled a rubber chicken from his jacket. It was studded with rubies and gold.

"That thing looks so dumb," Xianghua said, hiding her face in her hands and shaking her head. Raphael swung the chicken around like a lasso and hurled it up towards Dracula.

POOF (now there's a sound we haven't heard in ages)

WHOOSH (the pig plummeting towards Raphael)

THUNK (the pig landing on Raphael)

SPLAT (Maxi landing on the pig)

"Oof! Oww…" Maxi groaned. When he looked down and saw that he was lying on a pig, he rolled off as fast as his body would let him. He brushed himself off and stood back to laugh at Raphael.

"Haha! Stay down there with the pig, Ralph!" Maxi taunted. Xianghua jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow.

"Go eat a tree!" she grumbled. Cloud shrugged and turned around. He spotted a giant palm tree growing in the middle of the food court. Xianghua turned her head to him. "Not literally, Cloud."

"Say, Raphael, stop that! I was only joking man. Get up," Maxi said, slapping his thigh. Raphael didn't respond at all. "Hey, man, I said it was only a joke!" When Raphael still didn't reply, Maxi grabbed the fallen rubber chicken and slapped Raphael, thinking it would animate him. When he transformed into Kilik, Kilik didn't respond. Maxi nudged his head. "Dude, I think I killed it."

"Kilik, this isn't funny, get up!" Xianghua cried. She ran up and checked his pulse. Nothing. She grabbed the rubber chicken and whacked him. "He'll have a better chance of surviving as a vampire." She began to push the pig off and Draike helped her. They found that his ribs appeared to be broken. "He needs blood, fast."

"Where can we get some without harming anybody?" Cloud asked.

"Follow me!" Draike said. Cloud and Xianghua looked at each other and shrugged. Cloud picked Raphael up and ran out to follow the rest of the gang.


	4. Chapter 4 One Winged Health Nut

"There, put him in there!" Draike said, pointing to a cow pasture full cows and bulls. MK scratched her head.

"You've got to be kidding me," she retorted.

"Do you want him dead?" Draike replied angrily. MK shook her head. Maxi nodded. "You're evil, Maxi. Cloud, set him down in the pasture."

Draike opened the gate and Cloud stepped through. He carried the unconscious Frenchman to the nearest bull and set him down three feet away. He then ran out and closed the gate behind him. Raphael didn't do anything at first. Soon, his nose wrinkled slightly like he was sniffing something. A second later, his eyes popped open, flaming with hunger. In a flash, he was on the bull's back, sinking his teeth into its neck. The bull suddenly enraged, began thrashing about, trying to buck his attacker off.

Meanwhile, MK walked off a bit to lie in the soft green grass. Draike joined her.

"I'm staying here, this oughtt'a be a good show," Maxi said, gesturing to Raphael who was shaking the bull side to side rapidly like a rabid dog. Five minutes later, the bull lay dead, half drained of its blood. Raphael greedily glared at a nearby calf.

"SWEET MEAT!" he howled and charged after the calf. The calf looked up, saw the charging vampire and ran. Raphael chased after it like a dog chases a cat. "Steak! Steak!"

An hour later, Raphael returned to the gate, his mouth covered and dripping with blood. Strangely, not a spot was on his clothes. His eyes were cerulean once again and his ribs were no longer broken. He seemed to be at full strength once again.

"Dude, let's clean that face of yours," Draike said, pulling a water bottle and red handkerchief from a small bag on his belt. He handed then to Raphael.

"Oh, Sephiroth should be ready by now!" MK exclaimed, returning from her short nap. She ran off towards the mall. Draike and Raphael grunted and ran after her. Maxi followed along with MD.

"Are we really dragging Sephiroth along with us?" Cloud whined.

"I guess so," Xianghua replied with a shrug. "I'm sure it'll be fun. Besides, what's the point of a journey without a bit of challenge, eh?"

"Yes. You're right, Xianghua. I just hope he won't keep raving on about Jenova."

"Bah! Jenova, Schemova! Big whoop if he starts raving about some video game character he thinks exists. His problem, not yours."

"True."

"He is up and ready to go," the clerk said, giving MK a slight bow. "Sephiroth, apologize."

Sephiroth bowed his head. "I'm terribly sorry about earlier today. I'm sorry for being a hazard to you health."

Crickets. Nobody spoke.

"My health? Eh? Now what's the glitch?" MK asked, pointing at Sephiroth. The clerk scratched his head.

"Oh, yeah. Since I couldn't give him a newer chip like Cloud has, I had to find the least evil program. I found one but he will now be a…um…health nut," he replied. Everyone glanced at each other. MK raised an eyebrow.

"Well, um, ok then. It's better than the evil chip, eh?" she admitted.

"No, he's an extreme health nut," the clerk said.

"Stand a bit straighter, you're slumping over," Sephiroth commented to Xianghua. Xianghua stuck her tongue out at him. MK grinned really big. She ran to Sephiroth and glomped him. Strangely, he returned the hug.

"Awwww! It's too cute!" MK squealed.

"Eh?" MD uttered.

"Four to survive, Eight to strive, twelve to thrive," Draike said with a shrug. Maxi seemed confused. "Hugs. If it helps someone's health, I'm guessing he's gonna do it."

"I'm thirsty, anyone want a Starbucks?" Maxi half yawned.

"NO! BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH!" Sephiroth cried, spazzing out. Maxi chuckled.

"Just joking, man," he said, swatting the air.

"Actually," Raphael began. "I could use one. I need to wake up."

"Oh no you don't!" Sephiroth barked. "You need sleep!"

"Do not!" Raphael protested and the yawned heavily.

"Don't bother arguing with him," Cloud began, rather bored. "He's an MRI, CAT, nutritionist, optometrist, and everything in between. He can see every symptom of any disease even down to the common cold. You can't win against him. Sorry, pal."

"Grr," Raphael grunted and yawned again.

"Just turn into a bat and ride Sephiroth's shoulder," Maxi suggested. Raphael shrugged.

POOF

A minute later, he was on Sephiroth's shoulder, wrapped in his long, thin, soft silver hair asleep.

"Let's go on an adventure!" MK squealed. Cloud cocked his head, debating whether he should go on an adventure. MK smiled. "Yes, Cloud I'm serious this time."


	5. Chapter 5 ARGH!

"Hey guys!" Xianghua shouted as she ran up. She was carrying a DVD in a clear jacket and a portable DVD player under her arm. Everyone was having a picnic at a local park. Dracula sipped on blood while the others enjoyed ham and turkey sandwiches. Sephiroth and Cloud were talking while charging up at a nearby outlet attached to the shelter. Raphael was still a bat and was tucked in Sephiroth's front left pocket and was sound asleep. Everyone looked over as Xianghua approached. She didn't step high enough onto the pavement and her boot caught the edge. Nobody saw it coming except Sephiroth. He leapt over the dining friends and caught Xianghua just before she landed on her face. She hadn't let go of the DVD player or the disc. Carefully, Sephiroth set her upright. While he wasn't looking, Draike slipped a piece of Godiva chocolate in his mouth.

"Be more careful next time," Sephiroth ordered. Xianghua half ignored him and jumped up. She ran to the table and set the DVD player down and began setting it up. Sephiroth shrugged and plugged his charger into his seventh vertebrae. He wrinkled his nose. "Someone's been eating chocolate!"

Nobody said anything. Sephiroth followed the scent with his nose to Draike who happened to be sitting right next to him. Draike opened his mouth to eat a bite of his sandwich and Sephiroth caught a strong whiff.

"You're the culprit?" Sephiroth asked. Draike frowned and nodded. Sephiroth held out his hand. Sadly, Draike surrendered his chocolate one piece at a time. Sephiroth's eyes bulged even more with each piece. When Draike had surrendered all twenty pieces, Sephiroth's eyes had narrowed and his teeth were tightly gritted. He walked to the nearest trashcan and dropped them in.

"Oh stop it, Sephiroth. Sit down and charge yourself!" Xianghua barked. "I found an old DVD. You've got to see it!"

When the DVD had loaded, a menu popped up. Xianghua selected the play all button. The whole gang crowded around to watch. A map appeared on the screen. It appeared to be of the Tien Shan and Himalayan mountains. Strange markings were all over the map and different colored arrows pointed different directions.

"What is it?" MK asked.

"It's a DVD explaining about an ancient treasure. It is said that the treasure has some sort of magical property," Xianghua said. She turned to Cloud. "I can't download the map off the internet. Could you photograph each slide of the DVD?"

"Sure," Cloud replied.

"You too, Sephiroth," Draike said. Sephiroth nodded. The slide on the DVD changed to show a picture of a crystal on a leather string. The crystal was blue and looked exactly like the one that Kilik had. Everyone turned toward Sephiroth.

"Sephiroth, wake Raphael up," MD instructed. Sephiroth shook his head.

"Can't. He's in the deepest part of sleep and if I wake him, he'll be groggy all day," Sephiroth explained. MK clutched her cheeks in frustration. "Don't do that, Mary-Kate, you'll stretch your skin."

"ARGH!!!!!" MK screamed as she ran from the shelter. She pulled her giant magnum out and aimed it right at Sephiroth's head. "Shut your mouth!"

Before she could pull the trigger, something large and heavy landed on the barrel of the gun. A flash of red whizzed before her eyes. It was huge, flowing red cape. Above the cape, MK could see a head of long, straight black hair. The head turned to face her and she screamed. The man had eyes the color of his cape. "YARGH!"

"No firearms in a public park," the man warned. His voice was rough and extremely deep. Slowly, he turned around while still on the barrel of MK's gun to completely face MK. MK slapped a hand to her mouth to keep from screaming again. He was dressed entirely in black except for his cape and head band. His feet were covered in golden armor and his left hand was guarded by a clawed, golden gauntlet and vambrace.

"Vincent?" Cloud asked. The man turned back swiftly. He nodded once. Cloud wrinkled an eyebrow. "Where did you come from?"

"China. I've seen the treasure and it doesn't have an easy path to it," Vincent said, jumping from MK's gun. MK dropped to her knees, still creeped out.

"The treasure? What's it like?" Draike asked. Vincent chuckled.

"Like," he began, "everything ever said about it. It's the most brilliant thing I've ever laid eyes on."

"Then why didn't you bring it back?" Raphael snarled as he attempted to scramble from Sephiroth's pocket. Seph helped him out. Vincent grunted.

"I couldn't. The treasure chamber needs at least five people to enter at once with joined hands. I can't split into five people," he replied. Raphael pouted.

"So maybe this adventure was meant for us," Xianghua said. She looked around at her friends. "Maybe this treasure was destined for us."

"Maybe," Vincent said.

"Could you be our guide?" Seph asked.

"Yes but on one condition," Vincent stated, "None of you may back down once you have committed. This journey will not be easy at all and is full of monsters, traps, and magic snares. If you back down when already on the journey, you are asking for death. Are you all sure you want to do this?"

The crew was silent. Everyone kept looking around at each other, waiting for one person to say something first. Xianghua stepped forward and took a deep breath. "I'm in, Vincent."

"You are brave. You'll probably survive this quest," Vincent commended. Raphael and Maxi unintentionally stepped forward at the same time and said, "I'm in." They looked at each other, stuck their tongues out and turned away. Draike stepped forward.

"You have my word," he said.

"Someone's got make sure you all are safe," Seph said. Xianghua groaned and rolled her eyes.

"I'm going with you, master," Cloud said, addressing Raphael. Raphael nodded once. Vincent swiftly turned to find MK hiding fifty feet away behind a tree.

"What about you? Are you going to miss out?" he asked.

"Only if you keep at least twenty feet away at all times," MK whimpered. Vincent sighed and shook his head.

"That wouldn't suffice. The group must stay together at all times," Vincent said. MK didn't seem convinced. "I'm not going to do anything to you. If anything, you need to worry about those two vampires over there."

"Party pooper!" Maxi shouted. With that, MK pulled her magnum out and aimed it at Maxi.

"I'm in, sucker!" she shouted. Vincent chuckled.

"Make preparations to leave tomorrow morning. Until then, my friends," Vincent said, backing up. He jumped high into the air and shot into the sky like a rocket. "I'll meet you where the sun rises. Farewell!"


	6. Chapter 6 And we're Off!  I think

"This is lame! What are we going to do with an inflatable dolphin, Maxi?" Xianghua complained. Maxi chuckled.

"Where's your sense of fun?" Maxi asked. Raphael rolled his eyes and continued packing the basic camping supplies. He only packed flint and steel for fire since it was limitless to the many of times it could be used. He made sure everyone had a water skin and haversack for food and medical supplies. He packed simple and small bedrolls for everyone. He was meticulous about making sure there was enough basic medical supplies in each haversack and enough emergency food. He even packed for Vincent just in case.

"You're carrying that dumb dolphin, Maxi," Raphael grunted as he tied the last bundle neatly.

"So," Draike began as he chewed on a grass stalk, "what is our vessel for getting to the Tien Shans?"

"We will sail on a ship. What else?" Raphael said.

"A plane, duh! Go in style!" Maxi laughed. Raphael threw the rubber chicken at him.

POOF

"Now, now, children, play nice," Sephiroth said. Even Cloud rolled his eyes.

"Yes, mother," Xianghua grumbled as she continued drawing the treasure map from the DVD. Cloud had been looking into renting a pirate's ship for the journey. After all, renting a high technology ship was too risky for a journey that may not succeed. He had found one they could board the next day and was inexpensive.

"Say, everyone should carry a weapon. I mean just in case we get separated for some bizarre reason, we'll need to defend ourselves," Xianghua asked.

"Cloud has his sword and so does Sephiroth, Raphael has his rapier, I have my sword, You have yours, MK has her magnum and Vincent has his gun. What's there to worry about?" Draike pointed out.

"You obviously know very little of the creatures and terrors roaming the Himalayas and the Tien Shan," Vincent said roughly. Everyone whirled around to find him sitting on a box behind the group. He hadn't been there two seconds earlier. "Do you honestly believe that a sword will save you from an avalanche or that my gun can save me from the thick fogs that drive comrades apart? Will a mere stab of the rapier tear a chimera to pieces or the slice of a zweihander slay the Cerberus?"

"What? There are mythological creatures along the way?" Maxi cried.

"See you later," MK said walking swiftly past Vincent. She wasn't quick enough. Vincent's clawed hand whipped out and grabbed MK's shoulder.

"You committed, you will not abandon us," he half snarled. _Us_,_ he really intends to go with us_, Draike thought. He sighed with relief. Vincent pulled her back into the group and addressed everyone. "To safeguard yourselves of such creatures, we must take the powers of fire, ice, thunder, light, and darkness."

He handed key chains with orbs of different colors to each person; even the robots got one. Raphael had a red orb, Dracula had purple, Draike had blue, MK had yellow, Sephiroth had white, Xianghua had green, and Cloud had clear. Vincent kept black for himself. Draike dangled his keychain in front of his face. "It's so beautiful. Thank you, Vincent."

"These aren't toys…they're you personal sources of magic. If you can master the power in it," Vincent began. His orb dangled from his middle finger. Suddenly, a white orb with streaks of blue and green erupted from his hand. The orb encased Draike in a jagged block of ice. Vincent quickly sent out a ball of blazing yellow energy. The orb hit the ice and the ice melted. Draike staggered forward, shaking. Vincent lowered his hand, "then you might survive."

"You expect us to learn how to use these orbs in only a few days?" Raphael snorted. Vincent's eyes narrowed heavily.

"I have no expectations for you since I barely know most of you. You'll have no choice but to master the magic within a few days…if you want your life."

"Why do you keep acting like we're probably going to die at any turn? What's the deal?"

Vincent turned slowly. "You do want the treasure, don't you?"

"Yes, of course."

"Then stop taking me like I'm joking. I have made it to the treasure and past the obstacles. I know what I'm talking about."

"Oh! Darn it, Ralph, he got you there, eh?" Draike laughed, elbowing the vampire. Raphael glanced at him with disgust and grunted.

"Thank you, Vincent. I'll learn if you don't mind showing how to use these," Xianghua said, holding her keychain out. Vincent released a slight grin.

"It's good to know someone has some sense. On the ship tomorrow, I'll show you, Xianghua, and anyone else who wants to learn," Vincent replied, standing up. Dracula gazed at Vincent. Vincent was surprisingly shorter than he was.

"Alright pansies, who's first?" Sephiroth asked.

"For what?" MK asked.

"For a med exam. We need everyone in tip top shape tomorrow," Seph said, hanging a stethoscope around his neck. Nobody replied. Seph frowned. "Anyone?"

"How about Vincent," Raphael began, "he can make sure it's safe and that you won't abuse us!"

Vincent simply glared at Raphael. He could tell he wasn't going to easily get along with the blond fellow. Cloud sighed. "No, Raphael, Vincent can heal himself. Nobody knows why. So, right now, he's perfectly fine."

"Thank you for being the volunteer," Seph said, grabbing Raphael's arm and pulling the Frenchman into another room. Vincent smiled.

After five minutes, everyone's attention was drawn to the room where Seph and Raphael were by a deep scream. Raphael must be having trouble. He emerged a minute later holding his arm. Under his hand, everyone saw a band aid.

"What happened?" Draike asked.

"Just a vitamin shot, that's all," Sephiroth said. MK gulped hard. Seph smiled, "So, who's next?"

"Ah heck," Dracula said and stepped forward. Pointing in Seph's face, he added, "A vitamin shot will do nothing for me so don't waste the energy!"

Sephiroth smirked. "Oh, don't worry. I'm sure we can find something to help your insanity."

Next Morning

Everyone was awoken by a light in the room they were all sleeping in. MK was the first to wake up and when she did, she reached for her magnum. She blinked wearily and tried to make out who it was that had turned on the light. Blurred vision disabled her to see details but from the red and black figure standing by the switch, she guessed it was   
Vincent.

"Alright, pansies, wakey wakey!" Sephiroth exclaimed as he woke from his sleep against the wall. He unplugged himself and stood up. He strutted over to Xianghua and shook her. She responded by lashing out with her sword and knocking Seph in the face. Then, she turned over under her sleeping bag. Seph stood back up and tore the sleeping bag off Xianghua.

"I said wakey wakey!" Seph pouted. Xianghua was still asleep. Vincent shook his head.

"You really don't know how to get people out of their sleep quick enough. Watch and learn," Vincent said. He strolled over to the counter in the kitchen section of the hotel room and grabbed the bag of complementary coffee and ripped it open. He stuffed the filter in the maker and poured the coffee in. He poured twelve cups of water in back and turned the coffee maker on.

He then started cooking a huge batch of eggs. When the bacon in the microwave began to pop and sizzle, the smell of breakfast filled the room. Slowly, the non-vampires began to wake naturally. Draike was the first. He rose slowly from his sleeping bag and silently strolled over to the coffeemaker and helped himself to a mug of black coffee. MK was next and then Xianghua. Vincent put the glass pitcher of fox blood and put it in the microwave. When it was warm, he set it on the table. Slowly, the two vampires woke up.

Smiling, he crossed his arms. "And that, Sephiroth, is how you wake up a large group."

"Bacon! The fat! The calories! ARGH!!!!" Seph cried and tripped onto the couch. Vincent defiantly picked up a piece of bacon and bit off half of the strip dramatically. Seph cried out again. Vincent shook his head.

Cloud had awakened and had immediately set the table for six. The four robots merely sat on the couch and chattered while Xianghua, Draike, Dracula, Raphael, MK, and Vincent sat at the table to eat breakfast. After drinking two glasses of blood, the vampires turned into their human forms to eat the normal food their human bodies required. Kilik seemed totally clueless and nearly freaked out when he saw Vincent sitting at the table.

"Who the heck is he?" he raved. Vincent sipped his coffee and raised an eyebrow.

"He's Vincent. He'll be leading our quest for the treasure," Draike said. Kilik blinked, still staring at Vincent. After a few minutes, Vincent got impatient.

"I didn't know I was _that _interesting to look at," Vincent grumbled.

"Sorry," Kilik said and continued eating breakfast. After everyone was done, Vincent headed straight toward a table in the living room area and began redoing the copy of the map. Maxi turned back into Dracula and stomped over.

"Excuse me vampire wannabe but dishes need to be done and I melt in water!" he growled. Vincent didn't waste energy on looking up.

"I cooked, you clean. You've got a human side; use it," Vincent ordered. Dracula snarled at him and turned away.

"Geez, who sneezed in his cornflakes?" Cloud asked.

"He didn't eat cornflakes and nobody sneezed all through breakfast," Sephiroth answered. Cloud rolled his eyes and yanked Sephiroth's charger from the electric outlet. Sephiroth winced and grunted. Cloud shut his charger off and unplugged himself.

Ten minutes later, everything and everyone was cleaned up and ready go on the journey.

"Alright, where is the port where our ship is at?" MK asked.

"About ten thousand miles away in INDIA!" Raphael grunted. He turned to ask Vincent how they were going to get there in under a day, but Vincent was gone. Suddenly, Raphael heard Draike scream. He whirled around to find the warrior morphing into Tilt-a-squirrel from fright. A red and black cloud swallowed her whole. Raphael didn't see any of the others. He ran.

He was extremely fast since he was a vampire and his agility was neck breaker. He dart this way and that, evading the strange cloud that followed him with great precision. Still, Raphael stayed ahead. He didn't anticipate that a patch of autumn leaves was actually a lion trap. He crashed through to the bottom of the deep pit. He fell smack on his back and couldn't move. He watch helplessly as the red cloud engulfed him.

_"It was pointless to run, Raphael," _Vincent's voice rang.


	7. Chapter 7 Hail Hoho, Mateys!

WHACK!

"WHAT!" Raphael screamed as he jolted from his deep sleep. He glanced up at Maxi who was just standing up. Maxi held Raphael's jacket in his right hand. He held out his left for Raphael to grasp. Raphael roughly grabbed it and pulled himself up.

"We need your help. Vincent's taken over command of the ship and you've been dubbed deckswabber!" Maxi declared and handed Raphael a mop. He glanced around and saw that they were all on a pirate's ship with tattered black sails.

"What'd ya do, Cloud, kick Jack Sparrow's crew off the Black Pearl?" Ralph grumbled. Cloud grinned as he pulled a rope to lower a sail with strong arms. Sephiroth was right behind him helping. Ralph noticed that everyone was dressed in simple brown or black breeches, knee boots and white tunics. The girls wore leather bodices. He glanced into the Captain's cabin and saw Vincent lying on a velvet couch. He wore a rich red pirate captain's jacket and knee boots. A pirate hat trimmed in sable fur rested over the top half of his face. He was sleeping.

"Why does he get to sleep and I get brutally awakened?" Ralph complained pointing at Vincent.

"Because, idiot, how do you thick we got to India in seven hours from North Carolina?" Draike asked as he tied a slipknot in a rope. Ralph raised an eye brow and began swabbing the deck.

MK was in charge of cooking. Originally, Sephiroth had volunteered but even Vincent rejected the offer. Nobody wanted to be stuck with healthy but tasteless food for weeks. Still, Sephiroth hung over her like a fly while she cooked lunch.

"That's too much cheese! Do you know what cheese does? It causes-," he began.

"SHUT UP! I know what cheese does but everyone likes it so hush!" MK screamed.

Nobody woke Vincent for lunch but rather left his sandwich under a wire basket. Everyone complemented MK on the delicious sandwiches but Seph complained about the calories and how much damage the food would do to everyone's health.

Everyone had finished their tasks before lunch and so had a break. MK and Raphael played cards, Maxi took a nap, Cloud climbed into the crow's nest to look out for oncoming ships, Xianghua began to try and use her magic orb but only managed a tiny wisp of smoke. Sephiroth was walking around taking roll of everyone and doing his usual medical scans without anyone knowing when he noticed Draike was gone.

He scrambled up the middle mast like a squirrel. "Cloud! Draike is missing! Have you seen him?"

"Relax, he's taking a swim," Cloud said calmly. Sephiroth's eyes bulged.

"He'll drown!"

"Idiot, he has gills. His race can breathe under water. Chill out. See, there he is," Cloud said, pointing to a creature performing graceful flips and dives from the water. It was Draike but his ribs bore wide gills and his hands were completely webbed. He turned toward the ship and waved at the two robots before diving beneath the surface again.

He sprang from the water five minutes later and landed perfectly on the deck. He smiled and brushed his sopping hair back with one hand. "That was refreshing. I hope Sephiroth here didn't panic too much," he laughed.

"I was not panicking!" Seph claimed. Cloud smacked him in the back of the head. It was just then that Vincent emerged from the captain's chambers with his gun strapped securely to his side.

"How is everyone?" he asked.

"So far, fine," Seph reported.

"Good, where's Xianghua?"

"She's been trying desperately for the past half hour to use her magic orb."

Vincent said no more and walked by. He had spotted her on the bow of the ship. She sat near the rails and she seemed terribly frustrated. Vincent sat down next to her. "What's the problem?"

"I can only get a drop of water or a wisp of smoke. This is too hard!" Xianghua pouted. Raphael dropped from the sky right next to her making her jump. His magic orb was in hand.

"It was brave of you to try it on your own but when dealing with magic, never start without a teacher. You were quite lucky you weren't hurt," Vincent instructed.

"Who got hurt?" Seph cried out, rushing over.

"Nobody. We're fine. Go away, Sephiroth," Vincent grunted. Shrugged his shoulders and sauntered off. Vincent turned back to Xianghua and Raphael. "First, tell me what you trying to do, Xianghua."

"Well, I tried focusing my own energy into the orb and forcing it out as fire or ice," Xianghua said. Vincent laughed.

"Where did you get that tip, Dragonball Z?" he laughed. Xianghua's eyebrows drew close together. Vincent cleared his throat. "Sorry. But that won't work in this world. These orbs merely give you the control over the movement, energy, and structure of atoms. Basically, if you can master it enough, you may even be able to shapeshift or fly. But for now, we'll start with the basics. Let's make a simple flame on this piece of wood. You know what causes fire, right?"

"Heat and some sort of flammable substance?"

"Close. Pure energy and vibration of molecules and atoms. If you can get the atoms in this wood piece to move fast enough, it will combust."

Xianghua held her orb up and gazed harshly at the wood shard in Vincent's hand. She concentrated on the particles and atoms of the wood moving at extreme speeds. She forced them to go as fast as she thought possible. Instantly, the whole wood chip burst into flames and Vincent dropped it immediately. Xianghua smiled and wiped her brow.

"Hmmm…I wonder what I can make combust?" Raphael murmured as he glared over at Dracula. He concentrated hard and in no time flat, Dracula's hair was a pillar of flames. The vampire jumped to his feet and threw himself overboard and into the ocean. He emerged from the water and glared hard at Raphael, screaming curses. Atop his head was red patch of no hair.

"Well done, both of you. But that was unnecessary, Raphael," Vincent remarked. Raphael shrugged. He knew he wouldn't regret this at all.

A flash of silver streaked across Raphael and Xianghua's vision. They leaned over the rail of the ship to see Sephiroth diving into the water. Dracula was thrashing about in the water. He didn't know how to swim and was hyperventilating as he feared that he was melting. Sephiroth deftly swam over to him and hooked an arm around the flailing vampire's waist.

"WHAAAAA! MY DEMISE!" Dracula raves while he desperately tries to scramble from Sephiroth. Sephiroth nearly lets go of Dracula after being smacked in the face by him.

"Dracula, cool it! You're not melting or drowning! Chill out before you get a seizure or something!" Sephiroth yelled over the chaos. He swam mainly by kicking his feet. Soon, he managed to get Dracula over to the hull of the ship. A huge inflatable dolphin splashed lightly in the water next to him. He kicked hard with his legs and lifted the squirming vampire onto the dolphin's back.

"Dracula! Listen; you're fine! You're out of the water!" Seph shouted. Slowly, Dracula caught sight of his surroundings and clung tightly to the dolphin. Seph patted his shoulder and smiled stupidly. "See, you're fine…alright boys, haul him up!"

"I heard that you half-witted buffoon!" Xianghua screamed. "I have two X chromosomes! You of all should know that, twit! I am a GIRL!"

"Now, now, lass, calm down," Seph said, still bobbing easily in the water. Xianghua screamed and shot a thin stream of fire from her hand using her newly learned magic.

Once Dracula was completely in the ship, Seph sank below the water and let himself sink rapidly. He sank quickly and then suddenly swam up faster than the flight of a peregrine falcon. He shot out of the water and high into the air. He spun around and a black dove wing suddenly popped out from his right shoulder. He looked back at as if he was confused.

"What the heck?" Draike asked. All of a sudden, music popped out from nowhere and began playing.

_"Noli manare, manare memoria, noli manare, manare memoria…Sephiroth! __Sephiroth!"_ the chorus in the song sang. Everyone, including Sephiroth, was utterly baffled as to why _One Winged Angel_ was playing.

"Dude, why is that stoopid song playing?" MK screamed. Raphael rolled his eyes.

"Why do you think? Look what moron is floating in the sky!" he grunted. Seph was still hanging in the sky like a pitiful Christmas ornament on a Charlie Brown Christmas tree.

"Gah! Who cares! Just turn it off!" Xianghua grumbled.  
"OOPS! My bad! I forgot my iPod was on speakers…sorry!" Draike laughed. Everyone glared hard at him. Sephiroth floated down and landed with a light _thunk_ on the deck.

"Alright, turtledoves, let's see what kind of combat skills you have," Vincent said. He caught a puppy-eyed look from Seph. Vincent rolled his eyes. "And if you get hurt, go see Sephiroth!"

Seph grinned happily and sat on a water barrel. He stretched and his wing extended to a full length of seven feet.


	8. Chapter 8 Revenge Kicks You in the Rear

That night, Raphael had turned into Kilik for the combat test and Kilik received a good-sized slice down his arm from Dracula's huge sword. Xianghua had battled Draike and had come out of the duel with a nice bruise on her shoulder from the pommel of Draike's sword and Draike's muscles had locked up from over exertion. MK had a triangle-shaped bruise on her chest. Had the bulletproof vest been cheap, she would have been dead from Vincent's bullets. She had dueled him in marksmanship. Vincent proved to be her better.

Needless to say, Sephiroth was having the time of his…activation.

One day later.

"Why do you get to go bare-chested and I have to wear this? I'm not a Hindu monk!" Dracula argued to Sephiroth who was dressed in a Raja's silk breeches and curl-toed shoes. A short, buttonless vest sat around his chest. His hair had been tied up in a bun and a white silk turban was wrapped around his head. A green jewel and silver feather was pinned to the front.

Dracula was wearing a plain cotton turban and white robes. Vincent grunted. "Shut up, vampire! You have nothing to complain about. At least you don't have to play the eunuch!" Vincent snapped. His hair was tied back in a ponytail and his chest and arms were completely bare except for gold armbands. His left ear was fitted with a gold earring hoop. He wore dark crimson breeches and black sandals. His pale skin had been smoothly dyed and now he was dark tan. He had put in dark brown eye contacts to hide his fiery red eyes.

"Yeah but your costume is cooler!" Dracula complained.

Raphael and Draike were dressed as servants with simple white linen "skirts", linen turbans, and simple leather sandals. They carried large straw baskets filled with the supplies. The two girls were dressed in beautiful red and blue saris with gold jewelry lining their arms and faces. Cloud walked behind them. He was dressed like Vincent but his breeches were dark blue. He was also dressed as a eunuch.

"Nice choice of clothes, Cloud," Xianghua chirped as she flipped the shawl of her sari over her head. Cloud smiled and nodded.

"Can't say the same over here," Dracula grumbled. He pulled a rubber chicken from his robes and whacked himself. Maxi now stood in the white robes.

"Whoa, totally weird," he said.

"Alright crew, let's move it," Vincent ordered. He took his self-assigned position behind MK. Cloud walked behind Xianghua. Sephiroth was in the lead playing as the "Raja". Draike and Raphael trailed the two "eunuchs" and Maxi took position next to MK. They all walked off the ship and into the bazaars of the busy Indian port.

Draike and Raphael carried the straw baskets, Maxi carried only a cloth sack on his back, Vincent and Cloud carried smaller reed baskets on their back, and the two girls carried baskets on their heads. Sephiroth was the only one not carrying something.

He led them through the streets gurgling with cries of trade and shouts of sale. Raphael thought he wanted to barf. He was anthroclaustrophobic (fearing of thick, girdling crowds). He was also having a hard time controlling his thirst. With necks passing him with only inches from his fangs, he wanted to scream. He knew he would have to hunt soon. He thought about turning into Kilik but he didn't want to draw attention.

They walked nearly all day and finally stopped at a two-story inn at the base of the Himalayan Mountains. It was dark out and the day's journey had worn nearly everyone out. Even Vincent was a little washed-out. He wasn't used to exposing large portions of his skin to the sun. Raphael was exhausted from the sunlight itself and the burden he carried all day. The two girls had neck aches from carrying the baskets on their head most of the day. Maxi was foot sore from the cheap sandals he had been wearing. Draike however, seemed the fittest. He had little fatigue since he was used to wearing heavy armor for days on end anyways.

Cloud showed no response. Sephiroth, however, quickly became obnoxious. "Alright, who's up for a swim at the springs?" he asked. Everyone glared at him as if he was crazy. MK was massaging Xianghua's shoulders and neck and Raphael was rotating his lower back in several directions to work out stiffness. Vincent just yawned.

"You better take that as a no, Sephiroth. Suit yourself at the springs. I think I can speak for the rest of us that we'd rather rest up. Tomorrow's climb won't be any easier than today's walk," Vincent explained. MK flopped her forehead on his back between his shoulder blades.

"Thank heavens that there is someone here with some sense," she said, pointing to Vincent's head.

"Yeah, besides, you better not run off to the springs or I'll stuff your pretty boy face up Vincent's gun and fire! You pressed us on in lousy shoes and I bet all of us have cut up feet! I know I do," Xianghua shouted in Seph's face. She pulled up the hem of her sari and pointed to her feet. Indeed her feet had dirt-crusted cuts along the sides and toes.

"Yeah, me too!" Raphael complained, sticking his foot out for Seph to see. His was no better than Xianghua's foot. Seph's eyes bulged.

"I'm so sorry! Those have got to get cleaned!" Seph yelped. He turned to Cloud. "Cloud, heat up some water!"

Cloud rolled his eyes and filled a kettle with water from the room's sink. Seph went to MK's feet first since hers was the worst. MK yelped and whimpered the whole time no matter how careful Seph was. Vincent had cleaned his own cuts and his feet healed themselves. He helped by massaging the stiffness out of the others waiting for foot surgery. Cloud simply changed the hot water and threw away dirty cloths.

MK couldn't stand after her cuts had been cleaned. She grunted. "Well ain't you going to bandage my feet? I can't walk like this you know!"

"Go see Vincent about it!" Seph grumbled as he brutally grabbed Raphael's blistered foot. Raphael growled.

"Go easy, will ya, Seph?" he screamed.

"Sorry," Seph apologized and dunked Raphael's foot in the pot of hot water. Raphael screamed.

"ARGH!" He yanked his foot out.

While the two were arguing, Vincent had set to using his magic orb to heal the freshly cleaned wounds in MK's feet. The cuts closed up in the greenish light like zippers. MK slowly stood to her feet and found there was no pain; she smiled.

"Thanks, Vince," she said and went to cook dinner. Vincent slumped back down in the chair. He reached back and pulled his hair from the ponytail. It fell around his left shoulder and he quickly ran his hand through it. It would need to be washed soon.

Seph finished Raphael, Maxi, and Draike and waited for Xianghua. She merely sat on a bed and stared evilly at him.

"Come here, Xianghua," Seph said, beckoning with his hand. Xianghua stuck her tongue out and defiantly stood to her feet. She gritted her teeth and walked to the kitchen sink, where she propped her right foot up and let her foot soak under the warm water.

"Hey! Don't do that! That water hasn't been purified!" Seph whined. Xianghua ignored him and continued to painfully scrub her foot down. Suddenly, she was thrown over someone's shoulder and carried over to Seph.

"Hey! Put me down!" she snarled. She peered over and found that Kilik was carrying her. Kilik let her fall into his arms and he set her down on the chair before Seph. Seph quickly but carefully grabbed her foot.

"You're no help, Kilik!" Xianghua grumbled.

"Tell me that later after your foot is healed," Kilik laughed and resumed his position rubbing Draike's shoulders. Xianghua stuck her tongue out at her friend.

"If I survive this, Kilik, YOU'RE DEAD!!!!!! Y'HEAR ME??? D-E-D, DEAD!" Xianghua screamed.

Draike raised an eyebrow and turned to Kilik. "Isn't dead supposed to be spelled with an _A_?" he asked."OW! Sephiroth, that hurts you big…stinking rust bucket!" Xianghua screamed. Sephiroth ignored the insult and continued dabbing her foot. As his hot cloth passed over a particularly deep cut in the ball of her foot, Xianghua screamed and jerked her foot upward. Sephiroth hadn't expected it and her foot caught him straight in the face. Her blood streaked up the side of his face. Due to the fact that his skin was made of a strong, soft rubber alloy, it bore the impression of Xianghua's foot for a while.

"What was that for?" he grunted. Slowly, his "skin" sank back to its original position. Xianghua grinned and reached forward.

"Hey guys, watch this!" Xianghua said.

"Huh?" Seph exclaimed before Xianghua's bony fist smashed into his cheek. Once again, his skin retained the impression of her fist. "Ah, dang it, Xianghua!"

"Oh, cool! Let me try!" MK screamed and ran forward. But, before she could warp his face into something funky, Seph had grabbed her wrist and pulled her face towards him. His eyes were narrower than she had ever seen them.

"I do have expensive technology beneath this skin that shouldn't be messed with. Knock it off!" he growled and shoved her away. In his frustration, he used more strength than he intended and sent her flying into Kilik. Kilik had been massaging Draike's shoulders and smacked hard into his back. Draike had been sharing a strange conversation with Vincent about dragonflies. Unfortunately, Draike didn't expect the crash and the impact of Kilik's body sent him flying into Vincent who had been drinking hot chocolate. Naturally, it went all over his face.

"AH!!! My eyes!!!!" Vincent screamed.

"THAT WAS TOTALLY MY NOSE!!!!!!" Kilik groaned.

"I think I swallowed a tooth…" Draike groaned as blood dripped from his mouth.

"Ugh, I swear he did that so he could play doctor even longer…"MK growled as she pulled herself to her feet. She was now flaming mad at her robot. He was being downright obnoxious. She reached into her pocket and pulled out her magic yellow orb given to her by Vincent. She had heard briefly what Vincent had taught to Xianghua so she decided to put her robot back in his place. She focused on the molecules in the air. She focused on reducing their energy so that the molecules would slow down. It was getting colder. Good.

"Are you almost done? My foot REALLY hurts!" Xianghua whined.

Seph smiled. "Almost, lassie," he assured. Seph seemed to not notice any change in the air around him. He merely kept working.

A few second later, Mk screamed briefly. Her cry was cut off by the growing block of ice sealing away her head. Vincent, who was still recovering from the hot chocolate incident, shot to his feet and rushed over.

Placing his hands in the thick ice, he stared at MK's frozen, fear-filled face. Seph quickly set Xianghua's foot down and rushed over.

"What happened?" he shouted.

Vincent pointed to the glowing orb keychain in her hand. "She tried to use magic."

"Is she nuts?" Draike roared. Cloud sprang to his feet. He jumped atop the block.

"Back off, everyone!" he snorted. Nobody dared disobey. Vincent would have used fire but he didn't want to burn down the inn. Cloud took his black gloves off and tossed them to the side. The skin on his palms pulled back to reveal metal platelets. He closed his eyes and thrust his hands several inches into the ice. The metal plates on his hands began to glow white-hot. Steam rose from the melting ice like the cloud leading Israel through the desert in Moses' time.

His hands burned through the ice like Jell-O. Soon, he reached MK's head. He burned past her shoulders and arms before he couldn't reach anymore. "DRAT!" he grunted.

"That's not going to work in time, Cloud, stand back," Vincent ordered. Cloud leapt from the block of ice. Vincent briefly glowed red and his form expanded. His head warped into that of a wolf and his cape suddenly shifted to his waist. He had become Galian beast. He began clawing madly at the ice. Frozen shavings soon coated the inn floor. MK's body had been carved out and the remnants of the ice block had already begun to melt.

She flopped over and Vincent quickly caught her in his furry, wolf-like arms. Her skin had turned blue in several places. The yellow orb fell from her frozen hand. Vincent carefully laid her down on the floor.

"Is she breathing?" Draike asked, leaning over to see.

"Uh-oh! Anyone know CPR?" Kilik asked. Naturally, Seph was the only one who volunteered. Her ran over and lowered his cheek by MK's mouth. No breath escaped her mouth. Seph did ten quick compressions to her chest and then breathed three long breaths into her mouth. A few seconds later, MK began to cough roughly. Seph smiled.

"You okay, kid?" he asked.

MK groaned. "B-besides being f-frozen…yeah."

Vincent walked up. "You were lucky we were here. Don't try that without instruction," he growled. Sephiroth rushed up and shoved the half-wolf out of the way. He took off his Raja's jacket and silk tunic exposing bare…rubber alloy.

"Okay, dude…we do not need to see that," Xianghua groaned and hid her face in her knees. "One bare chest running around is bad enough," she said, pointing at Vincent. Maxi, who had been showering, stepped from the bathroom and saw bare-chested Sephiroth.

"Okay, whoa! Not cool!" he squealed and ran back into the bathroom. Seph chuckled and gathered MK up. His arms slipped behind her back and pressed her against his chest like a strong hug. She tried to push away but Seph only held her tighter.

"Hey…what a-are you…d-doing?" MK uttered, still shivering. Seph's hands curled around her neck where her main arteries were. Slowly, he increased his body temperature to 105 degrees. MK still shivered.

"Relax. You need heat," Seph said.

"Aww…ain't that just a Kodak moment?" Xianghua said, resting her arms on her knee. From Seph's throat came a low growl.

"You wouldn't be saying that if you were in MK's position!" he snapped. Cloud sat next to Seph and began to slowly rub MK's frozen hands. He too had risen his body temperature. Slowly…very slowly…color returned to her lips. In the meantime, Vincent had resumed his human form and was shuffling through one of the baskets containing the party's supplies. He found his mantle and cape. He carried it over and tossed it next to Cloud.

"She can use it when you're done," he said. He strolled back over to the "med center" to continue cleaning Xianghua's foot, only gentler. Raphael had taken to cleaning up the ice shavings from Vincent's "Ranma".

Twenty minutes later, Seph slowly pulled his arms away from MK. He quickly slipped Vincent's cape over her head. Cloud had let go of her hands and draped a thick fleece blanket over her as she lay back down on the couch. Draike had been making green tea and he brought a cup.

"Heh, why do you get first class service?" Xianghua grumbled. Vincent grunted and dried her foot with a paper towel. Quickly, he healed her feet and stood up. He washed his hands and resumed cooking dinner.

Maxi came from the bathroom again. He glanced quickly at MK and smiled.

"Hey, she's never going to warm up with a cup of tea. I know just the thing!" he said. He rummaged through his belongings in a basket until he pulled out a small bottle of brown glass. "This'll warm her right up."

He grabbed a small mug from the kitchen and poured about a mouthful of the dark brown liquid in. He put the cup to her lips and tipped it back. MK didn't resist but quickly swallowed the liquid…liquor. She swallowed before realizing what it was. It burned down her throat and warmth raced through her frozen limbs.

"GAH! THAT'S GROSS!" she screamed. Seph chuckled. MK glared at him. "And you didn't stop him, health nut?"

"Nah, whiskey is excellent for warming a person up. Just rest until we get some food," he laughed and stood up.

"Meh," Raphael said randomly.

Dinner was minestrone soup excellently cooked. Of course, no matter what anyone cooked, Seph had something to complain about with it. Tonight's complaint was that it had too much sodium although Seph hadn't even tasted it. He claimed that he could analyze exactly what was in it just by looking at it.

"This is delicious, Vincent and MK," Draike complimented. Kilik agreed by nodding. MK was still lying on the couch, still nearly frozen.

Kinda random but I'm going to jump to the next day! 


	9. Chapter 9 MK's Dumb Luck

MK was still very groggy as they all trudged into the valleys of the Himalayan mountains. She shivered as her thin silk mantle proved to be useless against the growing cold. Therefore, Seph stayed close by her and kept his arms tightly around her shoulders.

They had all dressed back into their Indian clothing but with more layers. Vincent promised that when they had climbed over the first mountain, they would all be able to change back into their normal clothes. He himself was getting rather cold too.

After passing the mountain, they came upon a series of caves where the girls went to one side and the boys to the other. Then, they changed into their comfortable, mountain clothes.

Kilik and Maxi had both turned into their vampire forms since they would easily be able to stand the cold. Xianghua, however, was getting very cold. Her clothing was thinner than everyone else's. Suddenly, her form vanished right before Draike's eyes.

"Xianghua!" he cried. In the short grass, a ferret with white fur was curled up, shivering. She popped open an eye and gazed up at the company that had stopped to gaze at her.

"Xianghua, is that you?" Raphael asked. The ferret slowly nodded and shivered again. Maxi strutted over and carefully picked her up. He began stroking her head with icy fingers. The ferret, Squeaker, shivered even more.

"Hey, hand her over! She can ride behind my neck," Seph said. Squeaker growled and bared her teeth as Seph reached for her.

"Don't be ridiculous, Xianghua. It's not like his hair smells bad or anything," Raphael grunted. Still, Squeaker growled at Seph. Seph cocked his head and frowned.

"She doesn't like you, dude," Draike laughed as he strutted past Seph.

"Come on, Squeaker, you'll freeze," Raphael said. Squeaker gazed briefly at Raphael and stopped growling.

After a minute of simply glaring at Seph, she nodded her head. Seph held his cupped hands out and the ferret pranced into them. Seph lifted the hair from the back of his neck and carefully set her between his high collar and his neck. Squeaker pranced in circles before finally curling around Seph's warm neck. Seph let his hair back down and the ferret disappeared in a blanket of soft silver hair.

"I knew she'd come to her senses some day," Seph said with a smile. He glanced at Draike. "You can turn into a squirrel, right? Want a ride?"

Draike smiled. "No thanks, Sephiroth. I'm good," said Draike, batting his hand at Seph.

The crew stopped for dinner. It consisted of chili made fresh by MK. Seph raved as usual about the terrible fat and calories. MK had to kindly pull him aside and explain that he didn't need to comment about everything in a meal. Still, it helped very little.

They continued on with very little conversation. The moon had risen high into the sky when they had stopped to set camp. Raphael yawned heavily after his sleeping roll was set. "I'm ready to hit the hay!"

"Ummm, sir, I don't see any hay to hit," Cloud said. Raphael laughed and patted his shoulder.

"I meant, I'm ready to go to sleep," Raphael explained. MK felt terribly gross and so despite the cold, she went to bathe in a nearby stream. Cloud went with her and stood nearby with his back facing the stream so he wouldn't see her. Even so, MK only sponge bathed. When she was done, she quickly dried and dressed.

She had just finished putting her fleece coat on when she heard a strange noise. It could barely be described. It only sounded like someone humming mournfully into a metal pipe. It seemed to be coming from across the stream. The stream was shallow so she crossed and followed the sound. She looked back to see Cloud still standing still as stone.

MK followed the sound closely and then, when she was about two hundred yards from Cloud, the noise suddenly cut off. Her heart began pounding. It had grown darker in the forest…much darker.

She heard a twig snap to her left. She glanced over. She caught sight of two, glowing red eyes in the midst of the strange darkness. Terrified, she screamed. Suddenly, the eyes and darkness vanished and moonlight poured into the forest. She sank to her knees and pressed her hand against her chest in an attempt to calm down.

"MK!" Cloud called as he ran up. "MK! Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine," she replied. Cloud helped her to her feet.

"What were you doing over here?" he asked.

"I heard a strange noise like a metal pipe and I followed it here. I just saw something over there!" MK explained, pointing to the spot where the eyes had been. "Two, glowing red eyes peering at me just a moment ago!"

"I think you're tired, let's go," Cloud assured and wrapped an arm over her shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm just tired."


	10. Chapter 10 Little Lost Sable

The same noise woke MK up in the middle of the night. This time, it was closer to the camp. She picked up her gigantic magnum and threw it over her shoulder. She wondered why nobody else could hear it. They were all asleep. Even Seph and Cloud were in their sleep mode to reduce energy used.

MK followed the noise out of the camp but made sure she could still see Cloud's glowing, fiberglass hair. The sound was a bit stronger this time. Once again, MK's heart pounded.

Suddenly, she felt encased in darkness and she couldn't see Cloud's hair. She was about to scream when a soft voice pleaded, "Please don't scream. I'm not here to hurt you!"

MK closed her mouth. "Who are you? What do you want?" she asked, her voice reeking with fear. Then the red eyes appeared again. This time, Mk didn't hesitate to scream. The eyes vanished and a hand instantly covered up her mouth.

"Please calm down, I don't like it when people scream!" the voice said. MK had felt warm breath on her neck signaling someone was directly behind her. It took her to realize that the voice was heavily laden with a mix of a Russian, New York, American, and Aussie accent. It was a weird, smooth mix. MK wriggled her head from the hand's grasp.

"Who the heck are you?" she asked. She turned only to stare back into the glowing red eyes. She was a bit relieved that the eyes at least were connected to a human face…or at least what appeared to be a human face. It was a man. Most of his wide, round face was covered by a white jaw restraint; the kind used when someone has seriously broken their jaw or something to that extent. Black bangs covered some of the right side of his face and spiky black hair cascaded down his back. He was only a few inches taller than MK.

"I am…uh…I forget," the man said, putting a finger to his…mask covered lip. His fingernails were naturally black. MK rolled her eyes.

"How could you forget your own name?" MK questioned, crossing her arms. The man shook his head and shrugged.

"I don't know…ask my brother!"

"Your brother?"

"Dear Weiss. Powerful Weiss. The only one who ever loved me and the only one I shall ever love! Except…well, that is all forgotten" (Dirge of Cerberus, ch. 10).

"Well, where is he?"

"I don't know."

"Well that's a big help. Tell you what; you remind me of an Italian person so I'll call you…Nero."

"Nero! Fancy that! You have made me remember my name. Yes, that is my name. Nero the Sable."

"Oh…well I guess I'm good at guessing names. Okay, Nero the Sable-."

"Just Nero is fine."

"Okay, Nero, how are you even talking to me? Your jaw isn't moving."

"Oh, well yes, I'm a ventriloquist and I've learned to use telepathy."

"Why don't you just take that restraint off and you'll be able to talk normally?"

"Uh, I can't. You see, when I was only eighteen, I fell off a five-story building. It was my luck that Weiss had been walking directly under at the time and he…cushioned my fall. Still, I had broken my jaw terribly. I don't know how to take this restraint off now that my jaw has healed. Weiss knows." (Nero's face cage— what really happened was that he started taking ballet when he was 18. He couldn't figure out how to put on his first costume, so his head was tangled up in it and it ripped. He couldn't figure out how to get it out of his hair, and nobody wanted to help him get it off because he used to talk so much and he couldn't talk with it on, so it's been there ever since. Everybody hated it when he figured out how to use telepathy, tho'.)

"Dude, how do you eat?"

"Uh…I guess I absorb it using oblivion."

"You're an odd one, Nero. What's oblivion?"

"The void of darkness that obeys my commands; the gift and curse given to me before my birth."

"I see. So why couldn't my friends hear your strange…hollow metal sounding noise?"

"Oh, well…um I didn't want them to."

"So you lured me here?"

"Basically. I like you."

With that, MK turned to leave. "It was nice talking with you, Nero."

"Wait! Where are you going?" Nero pleaded.

"To sleep! Where else?"

"Can I…come with you?"

"If you don't cause trouble, I guess so."

"Okay!"

MK was able to see Cloud's glowing hair and followed its light. Nero followed close behind like a little lost puppy. MK felt odd around him but liked the idea of having something that liked her enough to do her bidding.

MK returned to camp to find everyone still asleep. MK slipped right back into her sleeping roll and nearly forgot about Nero. She was reminded by his presence when his face popped into view only a few inches above hers. She yelped and slid out from underneath his curious red eyes. "Don't do that! See that silver-haired guy over there?" MK growled, pointing to Sephiroth who was draped over a large boulder and blowing spit bubbles from his mouth.

"What about him?" Nero asked innocently.

"He'll wake up if even an ant crawls by! You can't just scare people like that!"

"But you're so pretty!"

"Thanks, Nero, but if you're going to travel with us, you'll have to learn that flirting 24/7 isn't a good idea. Now leave me alone, I'm tired."

"Then, sleep, young maiden."

"Oh brother…this ain't good," Mk moaned and pulled the covers over her head.


	11. Chapter 11 Xianghua's Discovery

Xianghua woke up in the middle of the night to get some water. She carefully stepped over Vincent who was sleeping like a corpse in a coffin. The next obstacle was Raphael who constantly murmured in his sleep about fencing frogs. Maxi proposed to Ivy Valentine in his dreams and nearly shouted it. Xianghua chuckled.

RANDOM NOTE: Squeaker no talky. Squeaker can talk to Tilt and Chipper only. Tilt translates. Later, she figures out how to do more sign language, rodent style. P.S.—chipper no can talky either. She can type, tho'.

Draike's dream—tilt apparently took over his dreams, because he was twitching like a squirrel.

BACK TO THE STORY

There was a man sleeping on the ground near MK that she did not recognize. (I'm not going to describe him again) Xianghua knelt and stared curiously at him. Wisps of black and blue swirled about him. She poked at the white face cage on his face. The man didn't even flinch. He was deep in sleep.

Xianghua looked around for anyone looking at her. Everyone was asleep as usual. She carefully lifted the man's head and peered at the knots and snags on the back. She raised an eyebrow at their complexity. Quickly, she began fiddling with them. When she was done, she gently slid the mask off the man's face. She nearly dropped his head in shock. Despite the red lines where the cage had hugged his skin, he was a very handsome man in her opinion.

Suddenly, a strong gust of wind tore the rags from her hand and blew it far away. She grunted and went to get her drink of water. When she was done, she gave one last glance at the mysterious man and slipped back into her sleeping bag.


	12. In Which this chapter is too long

As usual, Vincent was the first to wake. But strangely, it was Kilik who woke up next. He shivered and wrapped his fur-lined vest tighter around him. He started rolling up his sleeping roll and then paused to glance at the man snoozing near MK. He had never seen him before.

"Hey Vincent!" Kilik called. Vincent turned around from starting a fire.

"What?"

"I think we have a hitchhiker."

"What?!"

"Yeah, the dude sleeping near MK," Kilik said, pointing to the black clothed body curled up like a kitten right next to MK. Vincent grunted roughly.

"I know that kid. That's Nero the Sable. I fought him a long time ago."

"Oh…kay."

Vince pulled his gun out and aimed it at Nero's head. Before he could pull the trigger, Nero shifted positions so his head accidentally rested on MK's shoulder. Vincent lowered the gun.

"Ah, the freak. He's here cause he likes MK," Vince grumbled and holstered his weapon. Slowly, MK's eyes fluttered open. Wearily, she gazed up at Vincent. After feeling the pressure on her shoulder, she glanced at Nero's head. The man was sleeping with a smile like a child sleeping with his favorite plushy. Grunting, she carefully set Nero's head on the ground and sat up. Vincent pulled Cerberus out again and aimed at Nero's head.

"Hey! What are you doing?" MK shouted.

"This…_vermin_…is _EVIL!!!!!!!_" Vincent began and aimed straight between Nero's eyes. MK screamed and jumped to shove Cerberus out of the way before Vincent fired (Cerberus the gun). Cloud immediately came up behind MK and grabbed her arms.

"Vincent, don't! He's not evil anymore! I talked with him last night!" MK screamed. Even Xianghua felt a bit nervous. She thought Nero was cute.

Vincent turned briefly to the girl struggling against Cloud. "This is for the good of everyone on this journey."

"NO!" MK screamed. Instantly, she vanished in a puff of smoke and was replaced by a much shorter, smaller girl that easily slipped from Cloud's arms. The girl's hair was black as night and was pulled back in two, tight buns behind her head. Her blue, pink and white outfit was lined with white rabbit fur and consisted of a thick skirt, boots that reached her knees, a ¾ sleeve shirt and silver bangles. She knocked Cerberus out of the way again just as Vincent fired.

Raphael had just stood up when he was greeted by a trio of bullets to his forehead. He rocked back with the force and cried out in pain. "ARGH! I'VE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH IN THE PAST MONTH BUT THIS TOPS!" he screamed. He was hoping to wake up to a nice cup of fresh tea but instead woke up to Sephiroth rushing over with a medical bag and Cloud straining to keep the ravenous Dracula at bay.

"Dang Vinny! That HURT!" Raphael screamed.

"Silence, Raphael! Lay down!" Seph ordered. Raphael obeyed and lay on his back. The three bullet holes were smack in the center of his head and bled profusely. Seph went right to work.

Vincent turned to the girl that had once been MK. She was knelt down by Nero and glared up hard at Vincent. Vincent was ticked. "Why don't you trust me? I know this guy and he's not one to be taken lightly. Move, MK!"

"…Mom…don't go there…it's too dark…mother…" Nero mumbled in his sleep. Slowly, his eyes fluttered open. He gazed over at Vincent who still had the gun pointed at his head. Immediately, he rushed over and bowed like a peasant before an emperor to Vincent. His hands covered the top of his head. "Don't hurt me!"

"Why shouldn't I?" Vincent demanded. Nero cringed.

"I want to help everyone! I won't be bad!" Nero pleaded with his face to the ground. "I want a second chance!"

Xianghua ran over and pulled Nero's face up between her hands. His red eyes had suddenly gotten huge and were tear-ridden. "Aww! He's too cute to kill! Oh! Look at his hair, all fluffy and black! Can we keep him? Please Vincent please?"

"No is no!" Vincent growled.

The 'new' girl stomped over to Vincent. She jabbed her finger into Vincent's chest and kept it there. "You're not being fair, dude! You may have had bad dealings with him in the past but it's not fair not to give him one more chance!"

Vincent was rather stunned by the girl's ordering tone. He crossed his arms. "What happened to MK?"

"I'm Talim! Get it right, Victor!" the girl snapped.

"Vincent," Vincent corrected.

"Whatever, Valerie! You can at least let him live and make him a servant!" Talim growled. Vincent holstered his gun so roughly, it was easy to see he was mad at Talim. The young girl didn't care.

"He's your responsibility," Vincent grumbled. He turned sharply and cruelly to Nero who cowered. "If I hear one complaint or misbehavior from you, I will kill you without hesitation."

"Shut up Vincent. You're going to make your head explode. I like the punk," Dracula said, crossing his arms. Vincent grunted and turned away.

"Thank you all!" Nero said and gathered Talim and Xianghua in his arms.

"YOWCH!" Raphael screamed and burst upright. Sephiroth shoved him back down by his shoulders. "THAT HURT!" the half-vampire raved as he shot upright again. He quickly jumped to his feet and stumbled forward. Seph instantly was on his feet.

"Sir, please let Sephiroth get those bullets out!" Cloud begged. Raphael snorted and continued walking away.

Nero cocked his head. "May I be of assistance?" he asked.

Seph grunted as he looped his arms under Raphael's and knocked his knee into the back of Raphael's causing him to fall backwards. "Yeah, stand there and look pretty!" Seph said as he struggled the half-vamp to the ground. "You're making this difficult, Raphael! Nero, I could actually use a bit of help here!"

Nero immediately rushed over with a smile on his face. It was the kind of smile a little boy would get when he gets to help his mother bake cookies for the first time. He deftly grabbed Raphael's thrashing hands and pulled them behind his back. Seph was then able to lie him on the ground.

"You're such a ninny, Ralph!" Dracula laughed.

"When they're done, I'm gonna' kick you into next year!" Raphael screamed as Seph plucked the first bullet from his forehead.

Draike shook his head. "All talk and no show…"

"SHUT UP!…OWWWWWW!" Raphael cried as Seph tried to remove the second bullet. Cloud was now having serious trouble keeping the ravenous Dracula at bay. The vampire was in full throttle and had the strength of twenty men (cloud has about that much anyways) and so Draike had to rush over and help pin him down. It took all of Nero's strength to hold the thrashing half-vampire down while Seph his hardest to gently pull the remaining bullets out. He managed to remove them but Raphael's constant moving had caused a bloody mess.

"Chill out, Raphael, they're out," Seph assured and began wiping blood from the Frenchman's face. At this point, Raphael had stopped struggling and was whimpering like a wounded puppy. Nero, who had previously been kneeling on Raphael's arms with the half-vampire's face between his rock solid hands, eased up onto his hold and merely sat next to Raphael.

"Master! Are you alright?" Cloud cried as he ran up. Draike nearly cursed as he struggled hard with Dracula. Nero quickly ran to help subdue the vampire. Dracula was no longer making sensible speech but only growls and barks erupted from his throat.

"Vincent, don't hold this against me!" Nero cried. He spread his arms out before him and a massive black cloud formed. Draike shoved Dracula into the cloud and the vampire disappeared. All was silent.

"Where did he go?" Vincent snapped at Nero. Nero cringed.

"Oblivion," Nero answered truthfully. "I put him in a mako bubble so he won't be harmed! Please to don't hurt me!"

"You better not, Vincent. I totally shoved the fool in!" Draike admitted. Vincent looked as if he was about to give birth to a cow. He was furious.

"And how long do you intend for him to be in there?" Vincent screamed.

Xianghua stormed up to Vincent and grabbed his hand. He tried to yank away but Xianghua had an extremely firm grip on him. "Alright Vincent, we need to have a little talk…"

Five minutes later, Raphael's head had been bandaged and the blood had been cleaned up. Raphael was sipping some apple juice when Seph walked over to Nero. Nero was sitting on a log with his head between his hands. Seph patted his shoulder. "How's our vampire doing?"

"He's gone mad. He's not scared at all, just…still insane with the smell of blood. I don't think I should take him out yet," Nero said. Seph scratched his head. He glanced at Draike who was plucking petals off a dandelion.

"Hey Draike, you have sedating powers, right?" Seph asked.

"Yeah," Draike replied, standing up.

"Do you think you could calm Dracula down if you went into Nero's oblivion?" Seph asked.

"Probably but erm…didn't you say something about your oblivion harming people?" Draike asked nervously. Nero smiled and patted Draike's shoulder.

"Only if I let it happen. I won't let you get hurt," Nero said. Draike sighed and nodded. Slowly, darkness crept up his body and engulfed him. Soon, he vanished.

Draike couldn't see a whole lot except black and a few wisps of violet and dark blue. Then, he could clearly see a clear, glowing blue orb. Inside, a creature thrashed about as if trying to break free. Draike then noticed that a blue orb was forming around him. It must be the shield, he thought.

His orb seemed to be moving closer to the creature's orb. Slowly, Draike's orb merged with the creature's. Draike closed his eyes and began to draw up his power. It blazed all around him as he opened his eyes again. His eyes were glowing bright violet and energy swirled around the creature (Dracula). Gradually, the vampire slowed his thrashing and he fell to his knees. Draike caught him and lifted up him. He tossed the vampire across his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

_"Ready?"_ Nero voice resounded.

"Yes. The vampire's alright," Draike said (Dracula's thought: these idiots don't know I can hear them in my sleep. I have a name, morons!). Slowly, the darkness was stripped away and green forest light filled Draike's surroundings again. He dropped to one knee and carefully laid Dracula on the ground. Brushing his hands off, he stood up. He suddenly grabbed Nero's head under his arm and gave him such a hard noogie, Nero's hair quickly became charged with static electricity, and miniature lightning bolts crackled through his hair for a few minutes.

"Darn it Draike!" Nero grumbled and struggled to smooth his hair back down. "Ow!" he yelped, and stuck his middle finger in his mouth. Xianghua wordlessly pulled a dryer sheet out of her back pocket and handed it to Nero. He looked at it confusedly, causing Xianghua to give an exasperated sigh and started smoothing his hair out for him. Meanwhile, Draike set Dracula on the ground and brushed off his hands.

"I think we should get back on the road," Xianghua said. Vincent glanced at the vampire.

"Good idea but who's going to carry him?" he asked. Everyone glanced at Nero. Nero glanced at Seph.

"I think the vote is for you to carry him, Nero," Seph pointed out. He poked Nero in the stomach. "Besides, you could use a bit of muscle on you!"

Furious, Nero suddenly slammed his fist into Seph's jaw, sending the robot reeling backwards and crashing into a tree. "You want muscle, you bag'o bolts? I'll give you muscle!" Nero snarled. Talim cocked her head. She hadn't thought that the cute, innocent looking Nero could suddenly get so violent. Nero grunted and hoisted Dracula onto his shoulders and quickly tossed him over to Seph. Seph nearly screamed as the vampire fell against him. Luckily, he caught him.

"NERO! YOU COULD HAVE INJURED HIS HEAD!!!!!" Seph screamed. Everyone suddenly turned to Seph.

"He's a vampire…a head wound ain't going to kill him!" Raphael grumbled. "Besides, you're the lazy one around here…"

Seph draped Dracula over his shoulder and put his hands on his hips. His nose rose in the air like a snob. "Am not!"

"We're wasting time. Let's just get moving," Vincent grumbled.


	13. Chapter 13 Don't Give Me that Evil Glare

Almost everyone was ticked off when they left. Nero was mad that Vincent made him walk in front where he couldn't talk to Talim, Raphael hadn't gotten his cup of hot tea, Seph was griping about having to carry Dracula, Xianghua was mad at Seph for no reason, and Vincent was mad that he had let Talim talk him into letting Nero come along. Cloud wasn't mad, but nobody else wanted to talk much, so the group was quiet except for their feet crunching the leaves and sticks on the trail.

They ate protein bars for breakfast and washed it down with water. Everyone simply ignored Seph's dumb comments about how there was too much sugar or salt.

Nothing interesting happened until early afternoon. The weather was getting even colder since they were climbing higher into the Himalayan Mountains. They were crossing a very shallow river full of stones and silverback fish (Raphael had fun catching some and Xianghua used her magic to carefully roast the fish). Everyone had stopped on the banks to sit and eat the fish freshly cooked when Nero froze. His eyes were locked onto something in the forest with his back bent and rigid like a cat ready to attack. He had been in mid-bite of his fish when he rose to his feet and set his meal down.

Draike must have sensed something odd too. He sniffed the air and wrinkled his nose. He too got to his feet and stared in the direction that Nero was looking. Cloud cocked his head and said, "What's wrong?"

"Something is coming this way and I don't like the smell of it," Draike said, unsheathing his emerald sword.

Clouds of darkness covered Nero's hands and back for a moment, and then vanished. In its place was a pair of metal, batwing shaped wings with a gun in the grasp of each elbow hand. In his real hands were two matching guns. "I don't like the sound of it."

Seph stood up too and cast a glance that way. In his head, he was scanning the forest with infrared rays, searching for heat. A huge blob of bright red crossed his vision. He copied the shape of the red blob and inserted the data into his SND (synaptic net dive) drive and began searching the web for what the thing could possibly be. He was shocked when the results came back to him. The creature was a basilisk.

"Cloud, get up now," he ordered. Cloud swiftly rose to his feet and took his sword from the holster on his back.

"What is it, Sephiroth?" Draike asked.

"A basilisk…the mythological beast," Seph replied grimly.

Draike immediately turned to Nero. "Do you think you could hold all of us in your oblivion in the same protection bubble as before?"

Nero scratched his head. "I think so. Why?"

"The basilisk's glare is deadly to anything lighter than it. Even Cloud and Seph should not try to fight this creature. Their circuits would get fried," Draike explained. "I can face it because I am immune to its glare but the others wouldn't be."

"If Nero could withstand the glare, I'm sure I could," Vincent stated. Draike shook his head. He cast a worried glance towards the direction of the basilisk.

"No, Nero won't be able to withstand it. I don't want you taking chances either. It is best if Nero takes everyone else and gets far away from here," Draike said. Vincent's eye widened and Draike knew exactly what he was thinking. Putting a hand on his shoulder he said, "Look, I know you don't want to but this is the only way. Please. I'm the only who can face this beast. I'll meet you ten miles northeast. If I'm not there in two days, continue without me."

"Make a decision fast because I don't think that growl is from a -," Talim whined but then was cut off. Her body froze and the colors drained from her skin and clothing. Everything on her turned gray and it wasn't until halfway through the transformation did Sephiroth realize that she was turning to stone. He ran to his master and gripped her tightly in his arms.

"TALIM!!! NO!" he cried. He abruptly turned to Vincent. "Make a decision already!" Vincent sighed and nodded. Nero closed his eyes and let oblivion wash over everyone but Draike. In seconds, everyone was gone but Nero and Draike.

Nero nodded once. "Good luck," he said and vanished into a cloud of darkness. He shot towards the sky and vanished from sight.

Draike knew Nero had left just in time for the hellish, orange eyes of the basilisk sauntered into view. The beast was jet black and covered in dry, flaky scales. Yellow saliva dripped from its fangs as it stared hungrily at Draike. Draike gripped his sword and prayed for agility, strength, and concentration. He then sprang forward.

The beast lunged at the same time and they met: sword against scale. The beast shrieked as dark green blood oozed from the new slice on its shoulder. Draike flipped his sunglasses down onto the bridge of his nose to protect his eyes from the searing gazes of the basilisk. He jumped up and flipped onto its scaly back. "Take this, sucker!"

He attempted a stab to the monster's back but he was quickly thrown off. He crashed brutally against a tree and tumbled to the forest floor. His head had been hit and dizziness swarmed his vision. The basilisk lulled in and out of his vision as he struggled to regain orientation. He had little time to react as claws swiped his stomach and drew four red ribbons where there had been creamy, smooth skin. Crying out in frustration, Draike bolted to his feet. This filth wasn't going to get the best of him.

As the basilisk rounded his claws for another blow, Draike swiped his sword in the direction of the oncoming paw with a furious fire in his eyes. The basilisk's paw was cut clean off its leg. Howling in pain, the monster reeled back, staggering on his remaining three paws. The bloody stub that had once been attached to a paw looked like a stick with green paint spilled over it rather than a bone and blood.

Despite the growing pain in his belly and head, Draike lunged forward again with his sword outstretched. The blade ran through the basilisk's thick hide like a knife through peanut butter. The basilisk's eyes widened and Draike could see the full extent of evil and darkness behind those glowing orange orbs. Terrified from the depth of darkness he had just seen, Draike stepped back a few steps and passed out.

The basilisk clawed helplessly at the sword stuck in its breast with its one remaining paw. Light burst from the wound and began to burn the basilisk away. The terrible shriek of the dying monster reverberated through the forest and echoed into every crevice and chasm. Then, once the light had completely burned the monster away, Draike's sword dropped to the ground and disappeared.

Draike himself had reverted back to Tilt-a-squirrel. The little squirrel still had the same wounds from Draike's battle, which was rather odd. It was apparent that the basilisk had poisoned him.


End file.
